New Year, Same People

As I have yet to contact the person in question here, I'm only going to comment on the actual ticket itself.

"User is not connecting to the network. I [Help desk phone support] asked if the laptop was plugged into the wall with a network cord, and she stated that she did not have one of those."

I wonder why she can't connect....

Missed Connections

Conversation I overheard the other day:

User: I don't have internet connectivity, so I'll have to forward you this email.

"Remote waste of time"

People don't seem to understand that "Remote Desktop" is only useful if the computer you are trying to remote into is turned on. This is pretty much, word for word a conversation I had with a user the other day.

User: My remote desktop doesn't work, I can't login to my computer here at work.

Me: Okay, was the computer turned on?

User: (irritated) Yes, of course my laptop was turned on, that was what I was using to remote into my work computer!

Me: No, ma'am... the computer at your office, was that turned on?

User: Why does that need to be on?

Me: So you can connect to it?

This conversation actually went back and forth for a good 30 seconds, she could not get it through her head that the computer she wanted to access had to be turned on in order to access it.

/facepalm

Thats why....

... you never give a user administrator rights. Someone dropped off their laptop today because they wanted Office 2007 installed on it. He will be getting it back with alot less. Aside from the normal things (Firefox, iTunes, GChat) there were a couple of other programs installed that I found very entertraining (keep in mind, this is a government issue laptop): Thinking Rabbit Adventure and Command and Conquer Generals. I guess he's trying to save the virtual DC before moving on to the real one?

You, Me and TV

The other day our "Command Center" was opened up for a training exercise. I was one of the tech's assigned to making sure the attendee's where able to access their information without any issues, and answer any questions they where going to have. These questions, also include me being an optometrist.

User: Will I be able to see the presentation?

Me: I don't know, can you see this TV? (Pointing to a 46" television that is showing the presenter, which is no more than 2 feet away)

"The Gang gets a Book"

Our office has recently taken to the idea of writing down all the funny things they hear on a daily basis and putting them into a book. They have called it their "One D Ten T" book. What a GREAT idea... I wish someone told them about this idea a few months ago! :-/

Anyway, here are a few excerpts from said book:

"I don't use laptops, does the Shift Key capitalize the letters?"

User: Why does my computer keep beeping?

Tech: You are pressing the CTRL Key instead of the Shift Key. The Shift key capitalizes the letters.

User: Okay, so I don't have to click on this 'e' icon for internet, I just type google?

Tech: No, you still need to open up Internet Explorer.

User: When the battery low is flashing, do I just need to plug it in?

Tech: Yes.

These are not all the quotes from the book, just some of my personal favorites.

Privacy

More helpful tips from your helpdesk. If you see your IT guy in the bathroom, do NOT asking him questions while he is urinating.